Fast X
F9: The Fast Saga introduced my theory on The Fast Saga, but Fast X may have proven it.
After skipping installments 2-5 in the improbably resilient series following an allergic reaction to The Fast and The Furious, I caught up with Dominic Toretto (Vin Diesel) and his crew of reformed criminals in the abysmal Fast & Furious 6 out of professional obligation and have reviewed each subsequent adventure. Three films later, I had my first tolerable experience of the saga with F9 — my fifth overall watch, bringing me in line with the numbskulls who kept pace with the franchise and crowned Fast Five as its first consensus “actually good” entry in 2011.
Five movies.
That must be what it takes for the series of cinematic concussions known as The Fast Saga to wear down viewers to the point that they start accepting them as legit entertainment. Because after my “I don’t hate this” experience with the 2021 installment, Fast X is the first to enter borderline recommended territory.
And no, it’s not thanks to the writing or any of the performances from the series regulars. Following an extended opening that revisits Fast Five’s Rio De Janeiro heist from the perspective of Brazilian drug lord Hernan Reyes (Joaquim de Almeida, Desperado) and his hot-tempered son Dante (Jason Momoa), Fast X gets back to Dom, Letty (Michelle Rodriguez), and their son B (Leo Abelo Perry) in Los Angeles where scattered mentions of “family” always seem to be accompanied by the corniest musical cue possible.
Once again, Diesel puts minimal effort into his performance, and the painfully unfunny “comedic rapport” of dull side players Roman (Tyrese Gibson), Tej (Ludacris), Han (Sung Kang), and Ramsey (Nathalie Emmanuel) is naturally also back, along with plenty of other ho-hum additions over the years who pop up throughout the film. (If you think someone appears, they probably do, especially if they’ve become famous in the interim.) But despite the factors that ideally would have made this series a one-and-done back in 2001, Fast X damn near succeeds thanks to its new blood.
Overcoming some ridiculously schlocky CGI, Louis Leterrier (The Transporter; The Brothers Grimsby) pulls off multiple memorable set pieces, beginning with an elaborate chase through Rome with a giant round bomb resembling the more nefarious cousin of the boulder from Raiders of the Lost Ark.
Orchestrating the chaos, Momoa is clearly having a blast leaning into Dante’s unhinged, flamboyant ways and earns plenty of laughs with his combination of one-liners and physical comedy. Nearly matching him is the return of John Cena as Dom’s little brother Jakob, essentially playing a new character in line with a PG-13 version of the actor’s Peacemaker, cracking wise with B while shepherding his nephew to safety in entertaining super spy fashion.
Earning a few laughs of her own, Brie Larson classes up the joint as Tess, the daughter of the currently missing spy ally Mr. Nobody (Kurt Russell) and our heroes’ lone friend in The Agency, whose muscular new head honcho Aimes (Alan Ritchson, Reacher) plays into Dante’s master plan by labeling them the world’s most wanted criminals.
All of these factors and more converge in physics-defying, laugh-in-disbelief ways as the team remains at least one step behind Dante, whose commitment to making Dom suffer pulls career-best work from Momoa and leaves the series with its most effective cliffhanger yet.
The sack of bricks remains the more intelligent option, but the gap is shrinking.
Grade: C-plus. Rated PG-13. Now playing at AMC River Hills 10, Carolina Cinemark, and Regal Biltmore Grande.
(Photo: Universal Pictures)
