One would think that wild, destructive nature of tornadoes would translate well to the big screen and inspire filmmakers to craft exciting complementary stories of human drama. But, so far, that’s yet to materialize.

Like its lousy 1996 predecessor, Twisters is bogged down by cardboard characters enacting would-be exciting missions that instead possess the pulse of a children’s basketball game. Whatever the code is, Jan De Bont couldn’t crack it back then and Lee Isaac Chung — whose Minari featured about as much action as a wooly worm race — sure as hell can’t now.

The screenplay by Mark L. Smith (The Boys in the Boat) presents yet another compelling premise: former storm-chaster Kate (Daisy Edgar-Jones, Where the Crawdads Sing) returning to Oklahoma at the request of former colleague Javi (Anthony Ramos, In the Heights) to study tornadoes with his team’s new technology — and potentially get closer to achieving her dream of chemically stopping the storms.

The noble quest soon resembles the competing ideologies of Twister when their scientific research is disrupted by the arrival of flashy YouTube sensation Tyler “Tornado Wrangler” Owens (Glen Powell, Hit Man). And though the attention-seeking hotshot injects some unpredictable energy into the proceedings, his team exponentially grows the cast size and Smith struggles to develop anyone beyond Kate, Tyler, and Javi (who have their own script-centered issues).

In turn, he makes poor use of Katy O’Brian (Love Lies Bleeding) and Sasha Lane (Hearts Beat Loud), two close-to-anonymous members of Tyler’s team, while British journalist Ben (Harry Hadden-Paton), who’s tagging along with Tyler to write an article on American storm-chasers, likewise adds little.

And it’s not like that thinly-sketched approach is intended to minimize heartbreak when/if they meet their end via tornado. The storms prove an inconsistent threat, leaving members of Javi’s and Tyler’s teams safe while actual nameless people they encounter are less lucky.

This combination of dangers that aren’t as harmful as they portend (at least for our heroes) and G-rated interpersonal dramas makes for an odd mix that zaps Twisters of suspense. That latter element also includes a fascinating lack of sexual tension, as if Kate, Tyler, and Javi signed chastity pledges before entering meteorology, all of which makes them feel more like paper dolls than young, attractive, flesh-and-blood humans.

Barely offering anything of note to warrant its existence, the question arises as to why Twisters isn’t a true sequel. The Dorothy IV storm-tracking system makes an early cameo, but otherwise there’s no connection to Twister — a somewhat refreshing approach in an era where actors revive roles decades later. Yet if the characters are going to be this forgettable, the filmmakers might as well have made it a legacy sequel and invited back Helen Hunt & Co.

At least then, something might have felt at stake. But as is, it’s one giant void.

Grade: C-minus. Rated PG-13. Now playing at AMC River Hills 10, Carolina Cinemark, and Regal Biltmore Grande.

(Photo: Warner Bros.)